Icebreaker

Would you rather be the star of your favorite TV show or movie, or be a member of your favorite band?

Recap

We’re wrapping up our series of Rethinking Church where we’ve been asking the question, “What constitutes church?” We’ve explored how the holistic expression of church can exist anywhere, at any time, but in order to be successful we need to develop, grow and strengthen four habits: Shepherding Others, being On Mission to spread the gospel truth, Develop Others, and Accountability. This week’s sermon focused on the need to be held accountable to God’s Word, to one another, and to ourselves and our own convictions.

Scripture Reference

1 John 3:21-22; Hebrews 4:12-13; Galatians 6:1-5; Hebrews 3:13-14

Focus Questions

Read the Scripture passages referenced above out loud one at a time. What did each passage say? What did you hear? Try to repeat what you heard. (Others in your group can help you along the way.)

1. What does this passage tell us about God, Jesus or his plan?

1. What does this passage tell me about people?

1. What does this passage tell me about myself? What am I doing well? What do I need to change? If this is God’s word for my life, how will I obey it?

1. Who needs to hear this story, and how can I tell them? Who am I going to tell?

Send Out

As my best friend and I walked along together I began listing all the things wrong with my partner. I was so frustrated and angry by all the little things he did and I was getting all of that off my chest. For almost ten minutes my best friend listened to me as I grew louder and more emotional. Abruptly she stopped and turned toward me. “I’ve got to tell you,” she said quietly, “sometimes you’re not very nice to him.” 

What?! Didn’t she just hear all the things I told her that was wrong with him? He left his dirty plates and dishes everywhere. He’d leave candy wrappers laying around not even caring that I had spent time cleaning up! This wasn’t about me – this was about him! 

She continued gently, reminding me of a recent gathering with friends where I had embarrassed him in front of others and she knew it was on purpose. He had handled it with grace, not responding, and we went on with our evening. I was the one who made everyone feel awkward. I explained that he had said something first – “I know,” she said. “We all heard it. But you decided to punish him in front of everyone instead of waiting until you could discuss it in private. You have to learn how to hold your anger and not erupt. Wait until the next day when you can tell him that what he said hurt you, instead of making a scene in front of everyone.”

She was right, of course. I had let my emotions get the better of me. I had wanted to embarrass him and make him look foolish. But in the end, I only made myself look petty. 

“C’mon,” she smiled, “let’s go into this store. I need to find a gift for my mother-in-law’s birthday.”

No one likes to be corrected. No one enjoys hearing they’re wrong. No one wants to be told they need to step up and do better than what they’re currently doing. I know I certainly didn’t like that moment on the street with my best friend, but she knew I needed to be called out. I can say her words that sunny afternoon were placed into my heart and I knew I had to do better. I started seeing different interactions from my partner’s point of view and realized that there were many times that I chose abruptness over gentleness and God expected more from me.

Without her words on the street that day, I might never have seen the growing that I needed to do. 

Name out loud the people you have in your life that challenge you to live by God’s Word. The people that will steer you back into the Word and ask if your words, actions or behaviors are supported by biblical truth. Name those who can call out your sin with love and hold you to God’s standard of who He calls you to be. Who in your life will remind you of your own personal convictions and the original passion you had in your relationship with Christ?

What would your life look like one year from now if you had people in your life making you accountable to God’s Word, to one another, and to yourself and your convictions? 

What do you need to be held accountable for?